and i do believe

2006-11-18T14:36:00.000+08:00

http://fair-vatican.livejournal.com/

new blog!

2006-11-18T14:28:00.000+08:00

A NEW BLOG
FOR MY THOUGHTS
TO WONDER OFF

http://fair-vatican.livejournal.com/">new journal

2006-11-10T22:34:00.000+08:00

To me you're strange and you're beautiful.
You'd be so perfect with me,
but you just can't see,
you turn every head,
but you don't see me.

I'll put a spell on you,
and when i wake you,
i'll be the first thing you see.
and you'll realise that you love me.

i think i've just fallen in love with a song.
im so stunned by it's beauty.

went to www with e,jas and michelle
and what can i say,
despite the chicken that i am,
and the number of rides i went,
i loved every minute of today.
so fun ok,
i can still feel the flow of current-ed water
against my body

And honestly to look you in the eye
its easier to lie

this distance between us,
this drift,
this thick wall between us.
i'm pretty ok with it,
problem is[--]
i miss you.

And maybe i could be the one
you need if you'd only show me

1month and five days to my birthday
10 days since i've bitten my nails.
going to be 24 hours since i __
yeah i'm pretty proud of myself.
i feel very accoplished.

Seems i'm standing on the edge
Looking down I can clearly see your face
In the crowd
Makes me feel i'm not alone

thank you God,
for all you've given me.

But watch as fingertips touch
and the life floods in
[word of the day]
wangle- to achieve something by scheming or manipulating.
And they swim to the sun

(And the long nights surrounds me You turn me around )

2006-11-01T20:58:00.000+08:00

blogger's geting boring,
and so is blogging.
i wonder then,
why then do i bother to update.

yeah sort of missing someone,
had her on my mind today.
end of school,
my school anyways.
report book,
hmm not bad,
very bad,
can do very much better

As i reminisce
My reoccuring dreams and you said

been into reading thse days,
borders got a particular book,
of my need.
ah
once again,
heads off to the stupid fools,
who loathe books.

i found my inspiration,
i haven't found qaf transcripts.

im so over you,
and you.

was being so close
and having so much to say
and watching you walk away
and never knowing

i seriously need a life,
but i don't believe in rushing,
nor do i believe in waiting.

And she broke your throne,
and she cut your hair
(no picture)
And from your lips
she drew the Hallelujah

2006-10-26T19:58:00.000+08:00

problem with her is that
she takes everyone for granted.
she does not know how to appreciate the people she loves

it's been a while since i blog,
nothing's change but i shall update.
man u won liverpool,
massa took 1st place in home ground,
alonso won the whole thing,
renult won too.

it's been a while since i blogged,
nothing's changed but i shall update,
her and i aren't talking,
thing is she can't see why not.
(it does not kill u to call)

it's been a while since i blogged,
nothing's changed but i shall update,
i got promoted,
and man am i happy,
but the deal is a hard bargin,
i'm finding it a trouble to keep my side of it.

it's been a while since i blogged,
nothing's changed but i shall update,
the two of us are amazing right now,
just curious about the third.

Cos all of the stars
Are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them some day

it's been a while since i blogged,
nothing's changed but i shall update,
matilda wrote me a very sweet letter,
today is the last day of school,
and i watched lotr and T.drift today.

it's been a while since i blogged,
nothing's changed but i shall update,
my hair got cut,
i bought new clothes,
and oh,
i watched Peter Nicol play today.
he's such a good player,
such a funny person,
and indeed he's very cute.
yes people and readers,
i got inspired.

it's been a while since i blogged,
nothing's changed but i shall update,
i haven't written a story,
nor have i read the transcripts for season 3 for qaf,
yes i do feel very deprived.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics
are always so certain of themselves,

(there will be no picture)

and wiser people so full of doubts
Bertrand Russell

2006-10-22T17:19:00.000+08:00

i'll forge liking love

so Maddy Beckett
has been my company
for the afternoon.
it is an amazing book,
and i have to add that the style of writing,
has gotten into me.
great,
i am starting to sound like the folks,
of St Milton
(yeah you don't know what i'm talking about)

so i'm over at sharan's,
using the computer,
because the internet at home is not working,
and damn
when i found a new video to goo-goo over.

yesterday
everyone came over
(family people meant).
it was hell nice,
and fun too.

oh oh chris,
HAPPY ADVANCE BIRTHDAY!

good luck for all those taking
their n's and o's.

and Massa's taking pole,
jasveer said n73 is not good,
just random thoughts.

btw i forgot to mention,
due to the lack of the internet,
i learn't how to make a movie yest,
yes yes,
i'm bloody slow.

I can't breathe
Until you're resting here with me
(no picture today)

2006-10-19T17:36:00.000+08:00

i like what we're at.
there is no obligation
nor any order

so results are out,
and though i am not quite pleased,
i am happy.
dad however finds it very weird,
that i'm proud of my math paper 2 marks.
well i don't blame him.
just 8 marks get me beamed.
didn't i not say to get one mark i should be given an award,
he thinks likewise

been having this stupid thing in school,
this finical course thing,
where we play this board.
hey,
it's fun.

so yeah [blank] are so stupid.
like seriously.
so much for women and intergity.
i mean common,
some good turns out bad.
ah whatever.

i have finally found the one person
that i cannot live without
nor can i live with.

son of sam

(did your sense take leave?)

2006-10-17T15:02:00.000+08:00

i know it sounds silly
but that little bit of touch mattered.

so went ice-skating with
jas,e and michelle yesterday.
seriously despite being unable to skate properply,
i had tons of fun.
i used that annoying bar thing,
but it made me go so fast,
that on many accounts,
i actually felt like i was flying.
oh jas,e and michelle,
was so patient with me ok.
i kept screaming,
im basophobic you see.

so nothing much to blog about,
been watching tons of shows
on fox crimes,
and oh yes tons of news stuff,
i declear that i love bbc,
but watching foxnews is so fun.
oh grey's ended last nite,
and my god,
it ended with me swearing.

walked down to gardens,
the amount of sweat i sweat,
would have been able to fill a bucket.
seriously,
it's so hot.
last i know,
psi reading was 77.

i would rather spend on lifetime with you

then all ages alone.

2006-10-14T22:24:00.000+08:00

my heart got treated by shock
just.

thank you rachael,
for putting sense into this brain.
i am quite grateful for that,
i am very grateful for you though.

so elaine says banks is here's,
baby no way,
he's mine.
n oh e find's randy harrison hot,
that is so cute.

punjabi sch was ok i guess,
went bishan with sharan,mama-ji and mummy-sami,
came home,
watch tv,
wine to chris,
met her,
came back,
wine more to her.
watch football n i am here now.

ok manu just played wigan,
and my god,
it was such a good match.
the goals were deserved,
and both side played good.
wigan however got tired easily.

so today i remembered stuff about that past,
the stuff chris said to change me,
and im glad she said that,
because i think i've become better.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUNSHINE,
much loves,
and may God bless you and the people you love.

oh chris,
thanks for last night.
saved the hell out of me.

do you know something,
i have never told you this,
nor has she.

but everytime she ask you out,
she expects a no.

(i don't know what he's after.but he's such a beautiful disaster)

2006-10-13T17:54:00.000+08:00

you know something,
to this one person,
no matter what you do know,
there can be no forgivness.
i might pretend my likeness for you,
but you've made me a hateful one.
yeah i never thought i'd say this,
but to this one person,
i loathe you.

alright so yst went out with nat,
and my god,
we spoke hell a lot.
i had fun.
met jas,e,mich,neo n tiff after,
e did her eyebrows,
i nearly freaked out.
headed home,
and i had fun with qaf last nite,
and when i mean fun,
baby i really mean funny.

went over to e's house today,
we caughty stick it up,
we wanted to watch u,me and dupree,
but the begaining was like "oh",
we played twister,that donno what game and monopoly.
we had pizza,
and then we left.
e lend me her LOTR part two,
i'm starting it soon.

rachael
take care of yourself,
alright.
get loads of sleep,
and take whatever medi for your health.

thank you to this person,
it was a pleasure reading your blog.

so i was thinking,
if we'll be able to fix this.
i see you sometimes,
and i try to put me in you,
i try to understand,
i try not to cause a worse.

but then you do something,
so silly that it becomes real.
you say a word that hits my heart.
and from do actions that causes a crack.

(i'ts not my fault anymore,
it's all yours. )

2006-10-11T21:38:00.000+08:00

a firmament of angels

i may sound like a fool saying this,
but baby,
i do love you very much.
i hope i don't scare you,
i hope you just accept it.
i hope you don't see this as an attempt from me,
to grab that wonderous heart of yours.
no,
i just want your company.

exams over,
that's it.
today's paper's were screwed up.

today's quite an honest day,
perhaps a patch-up day.
A & me,
B& me.
we're fine,
it was a pleasure receving that message,
i doubt i would ever have that courage to message that.

so i'm going to meet nat tomorr,
like yay la.
can't wait.

I love you so
Oh,you are the reason

You're why I feel so brand new
And from this moment on
I'm gonna dedicate my whole life to serving you

2006-10-10T16:32:00.000+08:00

there was some open space
between what he knew,
and what he tried to believe,
but nothing could be done about it,
and if you can't fix it,
you've got to stand it

so you think i'm mad,
i think you're mad.
i'm sorry ___,
i hope i have not hurt you in any way.

livejournal rocks,
sorry blogger,
you've lost a fan.

alright so just till 2morr,
i'm going to study my ass off,
oh oh,
i'm being very sweet to jasveer,
i so know she loves me.

this time,
i'm willing to let you go.
no more excuses FOR you,
no more of those such things.
this time,
it is goodbye.

exams are killing me,like seriously,
i stare blankly at my geog notes,
and all i want to do then,
is just cry.
because i know i'm going to fail,
nothing goes into this brain,
and this brain has seriously been over-worked.
it's going to burn out soon,
but thank God for the sane people,
who are cheering me up with after-exam plans.

we're in a new millennium,
and such desperate things no longer happen.

if you believe
that
you'll believe anything.

(and i pray to God,that he hears you)

2006-10-09T21:03:00.000+08:00

i have been quiet disapointing today,
haven't i.
perhaps you expected me to stay.
tell me are you mad?

so bio is over,
geog and math2 left.
like finally alright,
gardens with wee,nat and denise,
they made fun of my eyebrows,
but yeah it's hell funny.

i don't think i have anything to rant about,
not today's anyways.
but i think today
(not meaning to sound evil)
i wished i had stayed with you.
it might have turned out better,
and that is the truth.

Come with me
stay the night
you say the words but boy it don't feel right

So hello, good friend, I wanna be next to you

I remember the days we spent together

were not enough
and it used to feel like dreamin
except we always woke up

2006-10-08T11:09:00.000+08:00

I try to be strong for her
try not to be wrong for her
She will not wait for me anymore,
Why did I say all those things before I was sure

staying home today,
stayed home yesterday.
did geog the whole day yesterday,
and plan to do geog and bio today.
f1 is on,
baby's 11th.

She is the one
but I have a purpose
She is the one and
I have to fight this
She is the one the villain
i can't knock down.

and the city lights shine for her
and above them, I cry for her

[edit]
but I AM NOT YOUR FUCKING substitute!
you don't get to turn to me ,
just because she's busy or whatever.

Everything I know, and anywhere
I go
It gets hard but it won't take away my love

I see your face with every punch
I take and every bone
I break its all for you

And my worst pains are words
i cannot say still I will always fight on for you

Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing tails
Coming back as we are

(What if I fall then where would I go would she know )

2006-10-06T20:10:00.000+08:00

me:"this year i learned quite a bit about myself"
elaine:"me too!"
me:"i learn of what i am capable of,the worst and the best.
i learn of what other's are capable of,their worst and their best,
it's a bit scary thought"
elaine:"scary when you realise how fast time has past"
me:"yeah."

elaine and i had this conversation in morning,
a wonderful way to start the morning

so chem and lit over,
it was alright.
relax nat,
you'll do just fine.
now i'll be studying with jas
later at the club.
can't wait.
ton's to learn.

you know i try pretty hard
not to reach to this point.
i hate the part where doubt enters,
and i try my best to let it go.
i try to turn to people call friends,
but how long more should i burden them?
how long more till i stop before this point?

i like talking to you,
it makes whatever heavy,
seem much lighter.
it makes my heart feel joy,
joy only words from your mouth could bring.
i don't know what it is,
i just know it's no more love.

no matter how bad things look,
they look better awake than they do asleep.

When you die,
there's only one thing you want to happen.
You wanna come back.

(someday you're going to give me a heart attack)

2006-10-05T18:58:00.000+08:00

When you look at me
There can be no hesitation
There cannot be a close second to you

today's studying with jas
went very well.
we both decided,
on having some dinner thing
at our club at the end of the year.
it's expensive but it's a once.

chem and lit tomorrow.

Can't you see that
you're smothering me
holding too tightly afraid
to lose control cause
everything that you thought
I would be has
fallen apart right in front of you.
i think this is why you were angry with me,
am i right?

If you believe it's in my soul
I'd say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show

Sometimes it's so crazy that nothing could save me
But it's the only thing that I have

2006-10-04T15:01:00.000+08:00

i go nowhere high,
Go nowhere warm
until i can see your smile and feel your calm

ss and math paper 1 today,
it went better then expected.
thank you God.

no school 2morr for me,
good luck to all those taking PSLE(this is rather late)
and to whoever is taking their examination.
you'll do just fine.

squash today,
like finally after a long while.

chris
oh i enjoy taking to you these days,
though the subject is not very pleasent.
thanks for everything yeah,
and much loves

Just look at the state of you
Days in orbit passing through
How can I know if it's true
Forgetting makes forever new

Your hand in mine
And I've always known
You?re like a feather
You go where wind and fire melt together

I reckon there is nothing more to say

2006-10-03T19:03:00.000+08:00

today i felt protected

didn't go to school,
study the whole day.
it could have gone better,
but it went great.
jas was with me.
the club=our home.

need
A condition or situation in which something is required or wanted.

i need this,
you need this,
we need this.
they need this.
my theory,
you cannot need something,
unless you've lost it before.

Because every breath
that you will take while
you are sitting next to me
will bring life into my deepest hopes

iron curtain and cold war

2006-10-01T13:05:00.000+08:00

set your minds free
and let your dreams run free

yesterday was good.

going to meet jas and mat,
and we're going to study.

as I reminisce my reoccurring dreams
and you said
Im falling

2006-09-29T17:28:00.000+08:00

And I'm gonna love you
like nobody loves you
And I'll earn your trust
making memories of us

english paper was alright,
i freaked out in the middle of the paper,
as in i started laughing,
and i could not stop.
ok scary.
ate with the usuals.
off for olgc's thing,
with wee,her sis n my couisn.
after that sharan and i are going to the club.
i'm going to study,
while she does i don't know what.
NO MORE PUNJABI SCHOOL.
yay.

Is he everything to you?

but in my world,
there is only you

i wanna make your world
better than it's ever been

2006-09-28T16:28:00.000+08:00

you date your saint's
i'll stick to the sinners

You want too much.
You expect too much and
then when your hero disappoints you,
your heart gets crushed.

didn't go to school,
but i studied,
i'm so proud of myself.
did hell a lot of english,
and i didn't eat much today.
so wish me luck for 2morr's paper,
i'm kind of scared.

where they owned the world
and nothing seems wrong

oh you look beautiful
tonight

2006-09-25T18:50:00.000+08:00

You took me from all that I knew
Shown me how it feels to hope

punjabi sch is finally over,
no need to ever go back there.
but im going to miss those saturday mornings,
spent with my punjabi school friends.
bullying and just talking to all of them.

I LOVE KIM CHICK!

been studying with jas,mich and also wee.
all being very productive.
i'm quite glad.

i'm starting to have hope about my studies,
after talking to chris.
really,
the stuff she said to me,
it's my motivation.

so the transcripts turned out to be phony,
my god i'm like obesses with qaf,
like how jasveer is with her baby,
god baby's cute.

With You with me,
facing tomorrow together
I can learn to fly

2006-09-22T20:39:00.000+08:00

this is copyright
look at how many time you forgave brian,
i never forgave brian.
i never had to
because he never promised me anything
(my heart sank when justin said this)

i at this moment,
is feeling angry,sad and happy.
all for a fuckin tv show.
haha.
ok angry because i hate ethan for hurting justin
(let me rant about qaf ok)
sad because u just had to hear justin's voice,
say the above.
it's the saddest part of love.
happy because I FOUND TRANSCRIPTS FOR SEASON 2.
yes yes thank u,
thank u.

day was alright,
cca was fine.
punjabi exam 2morr,
gosh im so dead.

-the best but saddest fight ever,
the words,
the tone,
it's ought to stay in your heart

2006-09-21T23:11:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

your strong enough
for the both of us.

jasveer left early
and i felt really lost so i
took the bus home right away.

pb is great,
scary you know.
but it's nice.

oh fuck off now k

ok i hate today(except for pb)

-that was hot,
that kiss,
that was really hot.

2006-09-19T21:01:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

just hurry up and wait

only jasveer knows.

studied at the club,
almost done with bio.
started on geog,
rethinking about giving up on chem.
i forgot to bring my foolscap today,
I ALMOST DIED.

nothing can ever stay the same,
i'm sure the ww knows that.
but
it annoys me hell a lot,
how I expect it to be.

CHRIS
have fun studying for o levels.

you say hello,
inside i'm screaming i love you

-about me and you

i put my trust in you,
push as far as i can go,
for all this
there's only one thing i can say

2006-09-18T21:44:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

-Forgive the urgency

man u lost to arsenal,
liverpool to chelsea.
new goalie is cute,
both manu n arsenal could have played better.
ronaldo deserves credits though.

school was alright,
was in a mood to write stories
and so i did.
three page long not bad huh.
i like it,
my best i think so far.

i offically hate english,
because i hate english class.
SHE is the first person to make me hate
going to class so much.
i hate english,
can i like switch teachers.

you know what
today has been a good day.
chris
you're everything to me

-be my baby

2006-09-16T22:02:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

rachael wee,
i love you.

shireen saved my butt today,
sikhi exam rocked ok.
i was listening to alfred while doing the paper,
how cool is that.

tuition,
i found it useless today.
tasha came over for dinner.
nice to see her.

holland v with jas 2morr

-suddenly we were letting go
of something special.
something we'll never have again.

2006-09-15T22:39:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

-when i say go,
i never meant away

chris just made my day,
i miss her like crazy.
i know she knows that.
haha

did bio today,
and hey i'm almost there.
reached the chapter on the stupid heart.
damn it la,
tons of things.
tuition 2morr,
punjabi school 2morr.
gym i hope too 2morr.

-just before it gets dark

2006-09-14T21:24:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

-tell me baby

so everything's fine now,
and i got a surprise in a form of a sms.
thank u,
to these one person,
who made me realise something today.
it's you btw cow.
haha i like this nickname for u.
cow,cow,cow,cow

lukas is the frontman,
i love ryan still.
but lukas is sweet.
jasmine is out,
thank you

she's so biased ok,
she hates me so much

-but i love you

2006-09-13T21:45:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

-RYAN STARR I LOVE YOU

to jasveer,
i'm not writing this because u wrote something for me,
no.
im writing this because i feel that you should know,
that i care for you so much.
that indeed i do love you,
and when i say that i'll be there i mean it,
cos i will drop everything to be by yourside,
to make sure your alright.
for everytime you have helped me,
for everytime you've been there for me,
for everytime you've kept me company,
keeping me sane when i'm not,
i want to say a huge thank you.
i'll let you know this k,
you're going to be that friend,
that type of friend,
that even in 80 years time,
when we are all old and wrinkle,
you'll be that friend that i'll give a smile ,
and truely say,
oh how i remember this and that,
and oh how i will never forget it all.
you're the type of friend who's worth my everything,
esp my thought.
once again,
i love you

-i'll be glad to show you how

2006-09-13T19:52:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

-this i gotta blog about

stupid cow,
if it's this confusing for you,
if you don't know what the problem is,
why not you drop it.
the only reason why it started is because of you.
stupid cow,
really,
you think you've done everything right,
you think you haven't said something wrong,
not saying i have,
but atleast i admit when i'm in the wrong,
unlike you.
aww poor fuckin cow,
if it's this confusing you,
WHY THE HELL DON'T YOU ASK.
and alongside u is her,
just so her knows,
i can never hate her,
and i never will.
she means hell to me.
even if it may seem just words,
to her if your reading,
i really do love you,
care for you.
i don't want anything between us.

-you drive away.

2006-09-12T23:06:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright

-someone dies in your arms.
so u can save someone from death

i love my fav blogger,
indeed his words brighten up my day,
it inspires me in ways no one can.
i really love him a lot,
i feel like i have a bestfriend who i've never met.

-beautiful doll.

2006-09-12T12:08:00.000+08:00

this is so copyright.
I AM SO TALKING TO YOU

-five years now,
indeed it shocked the world.
it was a begaining,
of something no one was prepared for,
of something no one cared to be prepared for.
our worst fears,
humans vs humans.
[simran]

pretty fast huh,
seems like 9/11 was just yst.
i remember it ,
seeing it on the bbc after my uncle informed us.
oh the fear in my heart,
how cruel can people get
i ask God,
is this end?

happy birthday soh yi

great im falling sick,
no energy to do whatever.
my eyes are about to close,
and thus grey's would be taped.

today was good,
could have been better though.
we're pretending my dear,
we're pretending to be fine.
we both know somethings amiss,
we both know nothing's worth that risk.

[edit]
did not go sch today,
but i might just go for tuition.
grey's was nice yst.
there's new york n cm today.
im studying but i know it's just not enough.

i wonder if im making a mistake

-five years ago,
and now people hadn't forgotten
we each have our own tale,
but the tale becomes whole upon told.
to those who died,
to those who risk your live.
may your soul rest in peace.
and for those who survive,
with holes too deep to ever mend,
let us rescue you.
[simran]

2006-09-10T22:05:00.002+08:00

the computer is being annoying

seriously the computer is being so slow,
and so annoying.
i could kill it right now,
stupid technology.
schools starting 2morr,
and i feel it's going to be great.

days have been great,
i'm getting to use to things.
and that is hell bad.
sharan stayed over,
and that was hell fun.
ok im off now to die,
i am so dead.

stop copying my work

2006-09-10T22:05:00.001+08:00

2006-09-10T22:05:00.000+08:00

2006-09-08T16:49:00.000+08:00

-oh this is so copyright

just to anyone who reads my blog,
my post are so copyright .
don't you dare take my writings,
and post it as yours.
if u don't get a blow from me,
trust me honey,
you will from someone.

ok a bit out of point for a while,
i just realise why brian and michael will never be together.
they both mean hell alot to one another,
and every one knows,
ex's can't really stay friends with one another,
things will never be the same between them.
aww so sad ok once i realised ok.

if we are this close,
why don't u say anything to us.
we're not going to get angry,
and start hating.
we just want this to work out,
we don't want anyone hurt.
we don't mean any hurt.

-a giant leap of faith

2006-09-07T21:51:00.000+08:00

-You?re just the best friend,
baby. I?m sorry

yesterday was great.
an honest day for us.
i love the four of us,
i love it when it's just us.

blogging is becoming a bore,
queer as folk transcripts are fucked up.
season two is not complete.
natasha made my night yst.
HAHA.
paul's out,
finally but sorry.

today was a good day,
one of the best days i suppose.
did nothing,
but did everything.

-and i'll start back at one

2006-09-04T22:05:00.000+08:00

-my heart goes out to you,
to you and hopefully one day,
you'll learn my dearest,
i'd do anything for you.

today was a funny day,
squash was great.
went out with jas.
that was hell funny.

qaf is great,
brain and michael are my fav.
but damn ,
season two is not complete,
in transcripts.

breakfast with pecky 2morr,
school till 3.
staying over jas's i think.
greys in a while

chris,
you might not read this,
but hey i miss you a lot.
we ought to meet up soon.
loves

-you'll always be beautiful,
your brian kinney
for fuck sake's
'michael

2006-09-04T13:29:00.000+08:00

-all hell tremble
as i proclaim his name.

QaF is really great.
i really love it.
season one ended,
season two soon.

squash in a while,
out with jasveer.

stuff has been happening,
but thank you God,
for providing me with great people.
thank you for your love

-Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise

2006-09-01T12:23:00.000+08:00

-thank you god,
thank you ever so much.

much apology to those i disturbed yst,
much apology for my rudeness yst.
i'm really happy to hear my dear,
i'm really happy right now.

thank you camelia.

pizza for lunch,
squash for breakfast.
HAHA.

-lord to give you up,
i'd be a fool

2006-08-31T22:10:00.000+08:00

-If I could just see you
Everything would be all right

please don't leave,
i've got so much left to say.
i want to say sorry,
i want to say i love you.
please don't go,
it really too soon.
i've got so much i need to recall,
i've got so much we need to talk about.
i know you won't believe me when i say,
that i do cherish you.
i always have.
you've been my angel,
my guardian angel.
please don't go,
or if so,not yet.

queer as folk,
made my day today.
oh that god,
for the internet.

day was ok really,
school was fine.
neo,tiff n rice over at my place.
bring it on 3 we watched.
hell it was good.

-If I had to see you
This darkness would turn to light

2006-08-30T19:52:00.000+08:00

-i wonder why you do things,
i wonder why you seek pleasure in hurt,
hurt found in others.
other's who have brought you up,
loved you like thier own.
other's who still accept you after all,
other's who dare not HURT you.
why,
tell me my dear sister,
why do you do things.
why do you do these things.

horrible day,
i tried to make it perfect.
she's real hurt right now,
and there's nothing anyone can do.
i wish her would leave,
leave and don't come back.
go learn a lesson,
come back and beg for forgivness please.
learn a lesson.
she's really hurting right now,
she's so close to death.
i see it,
she wishes her life gone,
she thought of that.
trust,
probably the most fucked up thing
probably the most beautiful thing

i want to leave too,
i can't do this .
can't keep seeing you this state,
can't keep seeing us like this.
i want to leave,
the world perhaps,
you know how they say
death does not solve everything.
that's a lie,
it solves everything,
espcially once the pain fades.

-a cup of love is not going to heal,
it's not going to make you smile truely ever.
i don't want to be here the next time,
i don't want to be here ever again.
can't u do something please,
so that i don't sense your disapointment in me,
so that i don't have to see you this hurt.
i'm sorry to you if you thought we were alright,
i'm sorry that you had to know we're a bunch of screwed up kids.
please forgive me,
please let me go.

2006-08-27T09:13:00.000+08:00

-just this once,
i'm going to let it slip.
slip away to it's own fantasy.
my dear,
i'm letting you go.

yesterday was fine,
manu 2-1.
project's almost done.
dad left,
mai's leaving.

talked to chris,
and indeed it's been a long while.
punjabi school was alright,
nothing left to say.

to this one person:
you keep saying people are st,
hell,
your one of them.

-huh what?

2006-08-25T21:18:00.000+08:00

-it's so pointless getting angry.
anger leads us only to trouble.
i'm sorry if i've angered u,
that's all i have to say.

now chris is such a sweetie,
she's picking me up from punjabi school
oh how so sweet pls.
thanks jas,
i'm sorry if i sounded angry.
loves

so anyway made friends with mai,
the jap girl living with mich n phyllis,
the girl who is leaving on sunday.
sad pls.
we're sending her off,
loads of us.
aww we're quite sweet ain't we.
she wrote e a letter,
so jealous la.
she knows my name ok.
yay.

went for cca,
and strangly time pass quick.
after that stayed in canteen,
and made much noise.
rice,chick,sharene n jas,
all making fun of me.
bully me to be more proper.

to ep:
hey
i wanna thank u so much for everything.
for listening even after what happened.
for being there always.
loves

to this one:
i think i get what u feel sometimes,
i think i know why u do what u do.
i wish i could help,
really.
but im still trying to save myself,
when im done a promise to help u yeah

-Here's a riddle for you
Find the Answer
There's a reason for the world
You and I

2006-08-22T00:11:00.000+08:00

-i wish i could understand.
see things the way your'll see them.
the way your'll find it easier to explain.
i wish i could be grateful for my sight,
but doubts are telling,
i won't have them for long

super ex girlfriend was ok,
mind was seriously on something else.
michelle,neo,jas.
ps:neo looked like one of those,
ballooned up clowns.

to a certain extend,
i wish i knew certain ans.
like why God does what he does.
im so angry,
but it's so pointless to be.
to a certain extend,
i wish i had my own.
im fucking selfish now,
and it does not bother me yet.
but right now,
to a certain extend,
all i want is for you to be here.
for you to listen to my heartbeat.
for you to listen to my tales.
all i want is for you to say,
that the world's going to be better,
that im going to get better.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIFFANY,
you know i love you.

-oh how we could wish for happiness,
oh how we could wish for forever.
i wish i had a dream.
a dream with you in it.

2006-08-19T22:36:00.000+08:00

-i just want to be like you,
not like your face,
not like your hair.
but like your heart.
it's a beauty,
and i wish i had it to call it mine

Well if they say that love is in the air, never is it clear
How to pull it close and make it stay
If butterflies are free to fly, why do they fly away
Leavin' me to carry on and wonder why
Was it you that kept me wondering through this life
When you know that I was always on your side

i think being a couple,
is sort of cute.
the words your allowed to say,
the actions your allowed to do.
it's cute in a funny way,
and it's amazing in a strange way.
i think being a couple ,
is sweet.

punjabi sch was ok,
sharan came by.
i lied down for about one hour plus.
she left for a party.
home for the past few hours,
liverpool drew.

-thanks for making me smile,
all those internet people.
just something i need,
just something i want.

2006-08-19T11:09:00.000+08:00

In punjabi school now.
Blogging on shireen's phone.
Thinking of dy now.
Thinking of sweet love too.
thinking of her now.
Oh what week.

-love me now
fall for me then.
Let my heart hurt.
Teach me my lesson.

2006-08-18T21:19:00.000+08:00

-my theory
since nobody would say
since i don't want to know

we were fine,
but then u met others,
and it's ok to have others,
but they made you feel special,
made u feel everything i could not.
not that i don't mean anything anymore,
because im guessing/hoping i do.
i'm not jealous of them,
im not going to wish to be them.
i still do care,
but i think that's the cause,
the cause of my thoughts.

-just read.

2006-08-18T19:13:00.000+08:00

-now im thinking less of myself,
and i think thats a good thing.
my ego has made a u-turn,
and im left with the same old me.

just so you know,
my dearest rice i love you.

thanks for making me understand,
thanks for making me see.
i don't need to know anymore,
i just want to focus on living my life with you.
forget about those silly thoughts,
forget about those ungrateful moments.
forget about my ranting loads.
i hope you accept my apology.
i hope you never know about my war.

just met chris,
a haircute not worth it.
we laughed and that was funny.
roy,tina n elieen too.
yup yup,
a meeting worth it.

-Just before it gets dark
When the lights still hangs in the sky
The days not quite gone
All its promises still in your eyes
Between the time your mother calls
And the time you put the ball away
There's a lifetime to be lived
And a world where every dream is here to stay

2006-08-17T20:45:00.000+08:00

-what do u want me to say,
that i am not affected.
that i can't see the difference.
the way your treating me,
maybe it's my fault.
i just wish you would tell me,
i hate asking.

day was good,
but not all good.
i tried to smile seriously,
smile from my heart.
but seeing you like this,
seeing you act differently.
tell me if it's my wrong doing,
tell me if it just happened.
i'm not going to explode,
i just want to know.
tell me so i know,
tell me so i don't have to keep guessing.
i wonder if you know im talking about u,
i wonder if u know that i sense a distance.
maybe it's nothing,
maybe im just over-thinking.
just tell me.
say something,
anything would do.
sometimes when i wait for u,
i think i wait just to know i have company.
what a big fat fake i am.

just so you know,
im sort of hurt.
just so you know,
i wish i never have to face u again.
sometimes i think u would rather have their company,
then mine.
i know you would prefer that.

-i am such a fool.

2006-08-16T21:35:00.000+08:00

-Douglas Adams once wrote:
"I may not have gone where I intended to go,
but I think I have ended up where I needed to be."

i don't care right now,
i don't care if you care.
i wish i could go 2morr,
without having to meet your eye.
maybe i might just do that,
maybe that would lead to worse.
great,
thanks for this fucked up evening

i take back my words,
i wish i never did say them.
let them wonder in your head,
let them drift through your blood.
pretend it never happened,
pretend u never read what you did.

-I dreamed of you last night
in a field of blood and stone?

2006-08-16T20:50:00.001+08:00

-im so over being me

tiffany says my blog is boring,
i am suppose to blog more about her i suppose.
ok so here it is.
tiffany dearest i love you ok.
i care for you a lot,
and though sometimes your a fool,
i think your really sweet.
much love always to you.

i know i go on and on about how much i love you
and how you don't.

school was ok.
went late with jas.
we're sisters.
what a fool seriously.
ok so i made neo jealous.
my day is so complete.
reading stories once again,
i need to stop feeling guilty
and actually do something about it.

my heart just sank,
could i face you
knowing that deep inside im jealous.

-now smile for me,
but don't lie to me
it's not worth for this heart to break,
it's just not worth it right now.

2006-08-14T21:30:00.000+08:00

-it's not just you,it's all of you.
as all your beauty now bleeds
from the walls.
you consume my every being
-elaine

i love taking newspapers with gris,
we missed the whole lesson of english.
tiff had her surgery,
and it went well.

thanks for understanding,
thanks for being patients.
thanks for being there,
thanks for listening.
much loves to all,
esp tifffany

-And I tried to sing
But I couldn't think of anything
And that was the hardest part

2006-08-13T21:51:00.000+08:00

-It's alright, I'm O.K.
I think God can explain
I'm relieved I'm relaxed
I'll get over it yet

just met chris,
after a long time.
it was short but still something.
i love you chris.

dad brought me on a drive,
a long one around singapore.
well sorta of.
yayness.
much loves to him.

chelsea and liverpool playing in a while,
damn epl is now so changed.

project yst.
fireworks with wee.
woah loads of laughter.
guess what
my gums have stopped hurting.
yayness

-There's a lot of things I understand
And there's a lot of things that
i don't want to know
But you're the only face I recognize
It's so damn sweet of you
to look me in the eyes

2006-08-08T19:52:00.000+08:00

-sometimes u make me
feel something more then love
for you.
oh the pleasure of that,
you'll never know.

haha im kinda of crazy,
oh dy,
what to do.
you have stolen my heart
and you don't even know it.
haha

slept with sharan from 2-6.30
thank god we both love sleeping.
i dream of something weird,
something that made me very jealous.
i guess i do know how my sister feels.

school was fine,
lunch with tiff n e.
oh e you make me a happy child.
haha

-let all thats wrong,
fly out of lives.
let all joy,
enter quickly.
i don't know how to say this,
but i am grateful.
i love you singapore!

2006-08-07T20:55:00.000+08:00

For this one brief moment of time
-- for this one eternity --
there is nothing but the two of us,
and the trust we've forged together.
(desideratum)

i just wish i had someone
to say the above to.
it's so beautiful,
i guess i wish i could share it.

hi denise

met princess casey today,
she's just so beautiful and cute ok.
haha she's so funny also.
she makes me feel special.
yay.

-No matter how much
you need to trust me,

I think I need to be
trusted by you more.

2006-08-05T21:33:00.000+08:00

-i know sometimes it seems easy,
i know sometimes all i want is not what i need.
i know sometimes i seem torn,
seem broken,
seem wasted.
i know sometimes i seem confuse.
truth is i think i am.
truth is sometimes i live in my own world

now that everything on a hold,
my writing,
my problems.
my pride.
now that i seem rather calm,
i start to think of the things that never did make sense.
i try to make sense out of it.
i start to hate myself.
hate the things i do.
hate the things i didn't do.
wish i had done them.
it's all about regret i feel.
my thoughts,
my actions.
it's all about regrets i feel.

sometimes i wish that i could explain why.
why i doubt myself so much.
why i tend to hate everything about me.
why i look down on myself.
i don't think this is a problem,
though others might say it is.
i do wish though,
that i stop thinking about these stuff.

sometimes my mind is so tired,
my brains are so tired.
i've tried to stop thinking,
but i can't.
i think about the worst,
i think about the best.
i feel rather depress today,
i just wish i could take a pill,
and hopefully all of this ends.

-trying their wings
once more in hopeless flight
blind moths against
the wires of window screens

anything.
anything for a fix of light

2006-08-04T21:49:00.000+08:00

-oh baby,
i hate to go.
to leave you.
to see you cry.
oh my dear,
if i could hold on to you forever,
i hope you know i would.

i find it annoying that i always turn to death,
when things don't work out for me.
i hate that about myself.

what would u say,
if i ask you not to go.
to forget everyone,
to forget everything.
and start over with me.
would u take my hand,
and never let me go.

watched lake house today,
it's really sweet and nice.

-so kiss me,
and smile for me.

i love chick
tell me that you'll wait for me,
hold me like you'll never let me go.

2006-08-03T21:02:00.000+08:00

-i wish i could explain this sadness,
i wish i could understand what it is.
i wish i knew why so often i feel this,
i wish i could overcome this feeling.
this feeling makes me think of death,
this feeling makes me think im worthless.

soh yi just made my day.
griselda made my morning.

i know sometimes im rather selfish,
but i hated today.
esp when i saw you.
sometimes i wish i never have to speak to you again
sometimes i wish we never have to see one another.
i hate today so much

poor tiff had a bad day,
stupid __ was so evil.

-your sometimes all i want,
your sometimes all i need.

i wish i would stop crying,
i wish you taught me how.

2006-08-02T20:53:00.000+08:00

-sometimes it's all for the best,
the speaking and the not.
sometimes it's really not a big deal.

to you:
i wonder if you miss what we had.

much thanks to sin yee
for listening.
she's a doof you know
spoke to tiffany on my way to meet chris.
i think she's jealous for i seem popular,
in gardens anyway.

i still can't accept the fact,
that i failed __.
it breaks my heart.
i know it's just a test,
but still.

sometimes i wish that i have,
all the words to say to you.
all the words to make it all better.

to this one person,
i am so sorry that i laughed

-look at me with acceptance.
accept me with open arms.

i need you to read me,
i need you to learn me

2006-08-01T21:09:00.000+08:00

-i'd give you my best
if you gave me a chance.
each time i lay my eyes on you,
my heart i swear skips a beat.
i don't know dy,
why you have this affect on me.
all i know is,
it's not fading anytime soon.

i love neo sin yee ,
my dearest sunshine.
i can't imagine my life without u.
every morning seeing you ,makes me smile.
calling you,
bullying you.
it's my way of showing i care,
you know that right.
i love you.

u hardly give me a ring
we hardly do meet.
when we do,it's hardly a meeting.
i can't say this,without sounding so everything,
but im not denying anything.
i miss you so much,i want the old us,
the us where WE just talk,
laugh and cry together.
i want to be the one to hold you,
to be the one u tell stuff to.
i hate having to find out from someone.
i hate that you never tell me till i ask.
it's not your fault and im not sure if it's mine,
but i sighed today.
we seem so apart.

squash is like math,
i know my strokes,
i know my formula's.
i practice with a's,
i practice with perfect shots.
when test come's i tend to fall,
when competition comes i tend to fail.
squash is like math,
or atleast my squash is like my math.
i love the subject,
i love the game.
i just don't know how to handle it.

charity shield this sat.
chels n manu.

-An ounce of peace is all
I want for you.

will you never call again?

2006-07-31T19:45:00.000+08:00

As I recall with my stomach turning
I was hiding away from myself, away from you
Like nothing, though something was terribly wrong
And I admit that,I was only waiting for the right time
Night time,the right moment for you to look away
Though you never did, I pretended for a while
So I could walk where I dont belong

i hate today,
thanks for the cheer-up guys.
although it just made me sadder,
it made me smile too.
i hate today still.
everything about it.

i seem so useless.
i know i want it
but then i don't do my best to get it.
rewards,
screw it really.

I'll remember every word you said
stupid blogger,won't allow me to
upload pictures.
This time I won't look away

2006-07-30T21:54:00.000+08:00

-all those fights,
all those nasty comments.
i swear you know this,
they only made us stronger.

post dedicated to jasveer.
the one person who really has been there
for me always.
through everything.
it being sadness or happiness.
to you jas,
thank you so much for everything.
for all the smiles,
for all the laughter.
i do hope that even if u go to australia,
some day.
we'll still be in touch,
and as great friends.
i love you so much.
and i care for you so much.

-to jasveer,
i love you.

thank you for everything,
im always here for you

2006-07-29T22:10:00.000+08:00

-the war,
the fighting.
i do pray,
understanding comes between them.

nacho whatever,
with tiff,neo,michelle and jas.
we went to mindcafe,
thanks it was great.
after movie went bag shopping for jas n tiff.
they found what they wanted.
headed home once we reach taka.

what you said,
still in my head.
you've touched me,
you've made me understand.
for that all i can say is,
thank you.

the effect you have on me,
oh if only you knew.
the way you make me smile,
oh if only you knew.

-cos it's you and me,
with all of the people.
with nothing to do,
with nothing to lose

and it's you and me
and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

2006-07-28T20:57:00.000+08:00

-and i do believe,
what you had never said.

i want to thank you for the talk,
the tears were of joy.
i was afarid that u had joined.
oh the things i woud do to keep you safe,
to make sure your alright.
i know i don't show it often,
and i know u know.
i care and i love you so much,
im glad you said what you said.

43 with rice n jas,
made me laugh the whole day.
sch was fine,
chem was horrible,
bio was ok.
geog on tuesday,
thank you God,
for today

-to hold you yesterday,
to know i could make you feel better.

made me feel possible,
made me know im possible

2006-07-27T17:19:00.000+08:00

-for dy:
a little affection,
is diverted to you.
it's not love im sure.
it'sjust a harmless crush.

school was ok,
i wasn't trying to be evil,
i just had to say it,
you know.
kfc after school.
home.
camelia,
your an ass.

to chris,
relax aye.
things are going to be fine.
love you always.

-sometimes it
doesn't seem to fade away.

if i could,
i would take that hurt away.

2006-07-27T00:20:00.000+08:00

-what hurts the most,
was being so close.
and having so much to say,
watching you walk away.

elaine and i went wtf,
in the bus today.
woman infront of us had something in her hair,
made me wanna just get up and run.
haha.
we both wished each other good luck,
before parting.
only to find out that she was dropping at gardens.

i came home,
went to bath.
sharan and i slept
that was around 3 plus.
she got up around 5 to head home,
i continued till 11.30.
like woah.
studying now,
math,geog and chem.
i promise to do bio 2morr.

i wonder who you might pick,
if you were asked to.

-and darling,

what did you expect.

2006-07-25T21:32:00.000+08:00

-one by one,
we knew ourseleves.
we lost ourseleves.
sometimes it seems easy,
sometimes it seems hard.
i like you,
i love her.
why is it not over,
when we all assume it to be.

i got up pissed,
thank you jasveer so much,
for calming me down.

school was ok,
ss was ok.
i like it that we're talking,
i like it that we're smiling.
loves.

i am a believer,
i can't tell next.
oh Lord, the joy of books.

let this person come down,
in the most perfect moment.
it breaks my heart to know,
the only reason you are here is,
a reminder of what i'll never have.

-Dearly beloved

(blogger's uploading thing is screwed up.
no picture today.)
are you listening?

2006-07-24T20:57:00.000+08:00

-vote for elaine
woman of the year

tiffany said:
"i will eat in the morning,then recess time,
i walk with you"
im so touched tiffany.

english n lit,
no complains.
came home straight.
met chris
I FINALLY TOLD CHRIS,
thank's for the promise.
thanks for today.
it really meant a lot to me.

chris wrote this:
what breaks my heart,keeps me sane sometimes.
even when we knew it was wrong,
we gave in to temptation.
it's not lust,just a deep felt warmth,
the closest to you burns me,
but makes me love him more.
he's everything i want,
well almost.
sometimes your everything he's not.
you make me feel what needs to be treasured can be lost.
the need to feel you and hold you make me ache.
sometimes i feel sick.
but you've come and given me security on a level
i could never find.
but my love for him holds me back.
back from giving a chance tp stept in.
so,step in, insider what we have.

bring me back,
little smiles,
funny ways you speak to me.

-boy we're going too fast,

it's all too sweet to last.

2006-07-23T17:49:00.000+08:00

- i know your over,
i know i've forgotten my feelings.
i know it will never be the past,
but i miss you so much.
suddenly.

hello there fergi,
no van,no carrick,no one now.
just the same players,
but no van.
what you going to

oh what do i say about u,
it's sad whats happening,
and i don't think i can hold on for long.
i know i won't break,
i haven't.
i hate this feeling.

squash was good,
ss is well stuck in this head.
saw chris n the gang for a while,
everyone was being oh so nice i say.
made me wonder why.

i don't think i deserve anything

i need to watch tv,
like before.
those long hours spent infront of the black box.
i need to do that again.

-could i ,
if possible,
see what your hiding.
those eyes of yours,

tell me why do they fear,
what my heart has to offer .

2006-07-22T21:06:00.000+08:00

-so kiss me,
and smile for me.
tell me that you'll wait for me
hold me like you'll never let me go

punjabi sch was great,
didn't sit with manprit today.
i love her .
malcom with tiff n neo.
i swear i have very short
attention spend,
but thats only for studies.
i could go on thinking about
dy.
just finish writing a story for neo,
im glad she's sort of happy.
yay me pls.

and breathe in the scent of you. says (8:56 PM):
omg
can you make another story for me?
i swear your a good writer man

i know neo,haha
thanks

spoke to chris after what seems,
like forever.
i hope things work out fine.

-im all about

you

2006-07-21T21:48:00.000+08:00

-how can i say
i miss you.
without having to wonder,
if you found that weird.

happy cheer up day
i love my chick.

aww thanks michelle,
for making me smile.
aww thanks sunshine,
for making me laugh.
aww thanks jasveer,
for making me feel special.
aww thanks elaine,
for keeping me sane.

school was good,
i actually missed you.
malcom's after yoshi.
i met chris after that.
home.

"sometimes i feel that
i have to compete for your attention"
"do you?"
"what"
"compete for my attention"
"i guess so,though i wish not to."
"why not.why don't you want to"
"it makes me seem in love with you"
"well are you?"
-simran

"you seem threatened"
"i am"
"by "
"by you,you body,your movements,
you feelings."
"i would never hurt you,you know "
"i know"
"would you like me to stop this"
"NO"
-simran

i wrote two conversations,
i know it's weird but so.
i was reading fanfiction,
i came across this story.
beautiful if you can see beyond.
it made me cry at first.
it made me excitied next.
in other words,
that was a great story.
agreed by a few.

chris,
i hope i get to speak to you,
before u read this.
i was thinking to myself,
i wondered that if not for the age difference,
would we have gotten this close.
i couldn't help thinking of the past,
thinking of how grateful i am for you,
oh how much i've learnt cos of u.
thanks.

tiffany,
i was so touched by your letter today,
but i meant it when i said,
"im here"
because i will always be.
i don't know how to explain our friendship to u,
but i think u get it,
don't you?

-but the fact that i loved ,
before you doesn't ,
lessen what we have .

in ways,it probably deepens it .

2006-07-20T17:46:00.000+08:00

-i wish you could see me,
see me in all ways possible.
i wish you love me for that,
love me for who i am around you.

school was great,
i almost cried.
mixed emotions once again,
is fate a bit tipsy today?

it was all in our heads,
every moment,
every feeling.
it was something,
that we needed to want to feel.
-simran

off to meet chris in a while.

my heartbeats twice as fast,
whenever i see you,
whenever i know that you are around.
whenever i speak to you,
whenever you speak to me.
my heartbeats twice as fast,
some say this is love,
i know it's clearly not,
for i have loved before.
but what difference does this make,
my heart still beats twice as fast.

-read my eyes,
like as if it was this simple.
kiss me as u complete me.

you know as u hold me,
as u take control of me,
i speak to my thoughts,
saying"thank you God".

2006-07-19T09:32:00.000+08:00

-And exactly what,do I want"

from the above
"Someone that you can keep mostly under control,
someone who loves you, someone you love.?
A submissive that you can protect and control.
One, I think you have already found
otherwise you wouldn't
be so calm right now.? "

tiffany was being retarded
playing the i-think-u-suck.

you know it's weird,
i want to hear it from you mouth.
i want to hear your voice say it.
i want to know that there is hope for me.
that i could be with you one day.
i want to know that you would see me differently,
not the way we see each other.
i want to feel things i haven't,
i want to have the pleasure of that.
i know this is weird,
but i hope your reply would be,
"i love you too".

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away

today was a good day,
i asked for it,
i got it.
thank you God.
i felt loads of different emotions today,
i didn't know what to feel in actual.

-"so where does this leave us ?"

"with each other "

2006-07-18T19:52:00.000+08:00

- Had I known how to save a life .

sch was great,
after sch pizza hut ,
hide n-seek.
i realise i miss soh yi a lot.
and i never realise how easy it was,
to talk to clarissa about personal stuff.
homework done,
life as know it in 8 minutes,
criminal minds in about 3 hours time.
oh today's going to be good,
i can sort of just tell.

oldies rockin my world,
this few days.
their actually pretty good,
esp when it come to words.

tuition going,
has never been this exciting,
nor this fun.
thank u god for another blessing.
ps: jas ask yeah dad is can k.

common test next whole week,
damn.

-The things you've told him all along

And pray to God he hears you

2006-07-16T19:32:00.000+08:00

-and i can't make u see it through
thats something only love can do

chris and roy,
with homework,
for the afternoon.
mat came a while later.
f1 in a while while.
cheena listening 2morr,
good luck chris.
tuition 2morr,
squash also i think.
a brand new week,
brand new surprises.

lights will guide you home,
and ignite your bones.
and i will try,
to fix you.

500 skips today.

-when you lose something

that you cannot replace

2006-07-15T20:26:00.000+08:00

-and all i need
is you

this broken wings are falling

in punjabi sch today,
i almost cried,
looking around,
most of my friends are express kids,
making next yr their last yr there.
imagine when i come back for the fifth yr,
it's going to be hell different.
no more dearest manprit,
or shireen,or manider,
no more jaipal,parvinpal,
rasvin,jagroop.
no more dilmeet,amrita,
no more shanvir or amarpall.
walking to the bus stop with manprit,
i noticed a certain someone,
and i feel horrible for i had used him.
i like punjabi school,
im not myself in punjabi sch,
and i like that.

note to self:
punjabi teachers hate you

why do i feel
like the big bad wolf.

-tell me that your alright

that everything is alright

2006-07-14T20:49:00.000+08:00

-i love you all

u know what,
we're going to be ok.
im so sure of this.
all this is a phase.
infact it's God's way,
of making us stronger,
of teaching us lessons.
maybe we didn't catch the lesson,
the first time,
so thats why there is a second blow.
i do think God's amazing,
and im sure glad i've found him.

didn't go to the gym,
met chris instead.
ok i have not seen her in a long while,
and i honestly miss her like crazy.
i miss just hanging out with her,
oh wait maybe i think i'll do that now.
skipped 500 skips,
i am so proud of myself.

-thank u God,

for making me real

2006-07-14T15:49:00.000+08:00

-are u emotionless,
or do u simply not care?

i've never met anyone like you,
never in a long while.
i feel sorry for you,
but i just can't stand u.
i told you your stuff,
thinking as one of your close
(maybe was)
friends,
you would change,
but yeah nothing can be force.
im sorry for this treatment,
it's my way of making u better.

not much of a friend,
have a been.
yeah i know.
i ought to be shot.

criminal minds yst,
it was great.
heading to gym after media,
i ought to do somthing about my weight.
squash was hell fun yst,
and i manage to finish
all my weekend homework.
free as a bird,
ms chia's in town.

-and once again

the horns are blown

2006-07-13T16:48:00.000+08:00

-me or you?

sch was alright,
squash in a while while.
we're finally going to watch the criminal minds,
that we both missed on tuesday.
btw football season is coming,
epl,champions league.
i just can't wait.

no,
we don't hate u once again,
we just dislike the mini things u do.

are u being a coward,
well i know im often am,
but are you one.

oh chris,
your chinese oral has just ended,
wishing u the best.

-and all i ever felt like doing

was running away.

2006-07-12T20:42:00.000+08:00

-i guess this is
what we are

i love neo sin yee very much

when my lonely thoughts,
meet my lonely feet.

know what,
that was nice.
confessing is always nice,
even if the ending sucks,
its just having this loads of burden,
lifted off you.

sch was a no today,
pirates was great yst.
i saw max.
n jas saw her pcst.
movie was funny,
jonny deep was being gay.

chris is being once again sweet.
so is elaine,jas,tiffany,sin yee ,mich and gris.
family's been great
an honest wonder what i did,
to deserve such a great life.

-god only knows,

what i'd be without u

2006-07-10T21:23:00.000+08:00

-god knows,
only where we'll be.

i am honestly so grateful for this week,
and so i thank u god.
thank u for making this week the best.

tuition was the best,
malcom is cool and good.
he explain so well.
im glad i found him,
another blessing.
thank you father.

to this person:
what are we left to.
it obvious the other hates,
it's obvious this war ain't ending yet.
it's obvious the disapointment.
what are we left to,
could u do change,
sometimes a pls or a thank you,
would be nice to hear.

-go,help me believe

it's not the real me

2006-07-09T23:55:00.000+08:00

-i withstand,
all of hell just to hold,
your hand

finals in two hours.
i am laughing.
i love laughing.
i slept,
i love sleeping

-i need you

to hear u say

2006-07-09T15:56:00.000+08:00

-in your head,
their fighting

squash was great,
my name is in gold,
for real.
tuiton starting 2morr,
e scared us yst with the cheating scandal.
did i say how much i love yst.
finals 2morr morning,
i swear life can't get any better.

do you care ,
if i don't know what to say

chris made me smile today

-will you sleep tonight,

or
will you think of me

2006-07-08T22:33:00.000+08:00

-honestly fuck off

omg i love today,
from meeting the si ppl,
to getting 10 free tickets ,
to buying boxers,
to towning,
to bitching,
to being honest,
to being ourseleves.
omg i love today!

to this one person:
if only you knew,
how much i can't stand u now,
stop it now,
let's forget us i want to say.
let's just forget us.

-when did i go wrong

i lost a friend

2006-07-06T21:51:00.000+08:00

-every story has an end,
but i prefer to begain again,
just like a book ive never read,
i prefer to begain again.

germany and portugal out,
lesson that i witnessed,
don't count your chicken before they hatch.

half-blooded prince,
tuesday with morrie,
five people you meet in heaven,
have been keeping me company these days.
i am believer next.
i love books.

you leaving the writing world,
nope your leaving the blogging world.
oh im going to miss your writing,
esp when it's on love.

nicole dearest,
im going to miss u.

-leaving you,

loving you.

2006-07-05T21:02:00.000+08:00

-all i do is fall,
just fall deeper
with every minute passing.

it get's me wondering,
why people talk about love so often.
me for a take,
i love being in love,
i love the feeling,
but why do i talk about it,
every single day of my life.
it is wonderful,
but nothing stays that wonderful.

you come over announced,
silence broken by your voice in the dark,
i need you here tonight ,
just like the ocean needs the waves.

just another way to survive.

i know there is nothing wrong with me,
there is nothing that i am feeling.
i just get caught up in the feelings that i want to feel,
that i get sad,
that i get disapointed.
like i said before,
wanting leads to no where.

-you get to make sense
out of your yesterday.

2006-07-04T21:11:00.000+08:00

-i wan a person to talk to

i want to talk to someone,
i want to cry with someone,
i want to understand that someone,
i want that someone to understand me.
i want to talk to anyone who's listening,
i just want someone,
someone new.

do u believe it's easier,
to spill your thoughts to a stranger,
then your own best friend.

-to open what it holds.

2006-07-03T22:25:00.000+08:00

-let's all dance,
let's dance for our lives

im sorry

-let's hide,
let's hide for our lives

2006-07-03T16:39:00.000+08:00

-tell me for i need to understand,
tell me for i need to learn.
don't fear that i'd get angry,
don't fear that i might leave.
tell me for i need to improve,
tell me for i can be better.
tell me so that i can,
oh all things,
fall in love with myself.
[simran]

want's and need's,
need's and want's,
honestly pls fuck off.

i don't get it,
why do people bother so much,
about what is needed and what is wanted.
can't we go on with everything,
without thinking oh shit,
this is what is expected.
this is what i want.
big deal is we know what we want,
big deal if we do not know what we want.
can't we just live life without any complications,
can we just pretend our live's are like plays.
a mistake made,
can always be corrected.

my three hour's of studying,
is honestly coming to good use.
i wished i had gone today you know,
i just wished it wasn't a bad timing.

let's talk about you and i,
let's talk about what's bothering.
yup i agree it is my fault,
yup i do agree it works both ways,
yup i do agree this won't work out,
if we don't make an effort.
let's talk about you and i,
let's wait till the sun shines once more,
let's wait till the wolfs howl.
let's just wait till tear's flow,
for only then,
only then do we get,
what went wrong.

-tell the world that

2006-07-02T22:48:00.000+08:00

-Tell the world that
Jesus lives
Tell the world that,
tell the world that
Tell the world that
he died for them
Tell the world that
he lives again

today was great,
i love god!

-Cause all I want in this lifetime is You
And all i want in this whole world is you

2006-07-01T13:14:00.000+08:00

-we'd hang our heads,
and pretend love teared.
[simran]

manprit is honestly,
the sweetest thing on earth.
"i'll go if you have to",
i know i won't forget that.
it's ought to be the sweetest thing anyone ,
has ever said to me.
makes me think,
if im worth all this sweetness.

i wonder if you read,
but if you do.
tell u this,
you make me feel special.
no this is not for dy,
not for my ex-love.
but for a friend,
that you know well.
you think we'd ever be ok?
you think we could be like last time?
im missing you a lot suddenly,
im missing stuff about u.

-i like to pretend,
and play dress up.
i like to laugh,
but pretend it cries
[simran]

2006-06-30T21:55:00.000+08:00

-have u ever had this feeling,
that everything your doing is wrong.
the way you treat the people around u,
the way you feel about youself
and the things you do.
but even though you feel so wrong,
u don't do anything about it?
"my convo with sunshine"
i love her

sch was ok,
damn ms ___and mrs __.
i feel lost of control,
i feel i can do better.
i think i can do better

to this person:
i don't know what to say.
i don't know if we'll ever be ok.
i know i am fault,
but can you say your not.
it seems we're going to part,
it seems we're on cold war.
thanks for the smile though,
it was the best thing that happened today.

-i think i've guessed,
my way through lies.
i think those heartbreaks,
were really close to nothing.
i think i want something too much,
rather then it come to me.
i think i've learnt,
i think again.
[simran]

2006-06-29T20:24:00.000+08:00

-life's good,
without you

sin yee,tiffany,
griselda,chick,
shantal ,wee,
natasha and cherly ,
all made my day.
thanks for the smile people,
thank you god,
for making the day perfect.

-we could be
more then just,
amazing

2006-06-28T20:18:00.000+08:00

-to say you mean
the most

oh what a day!,
thought of you all through the bus ride,
seriously the nerve of some people,
it's honestly pissing me off.
i like malay lesson,
we stood outside n spoke.
after school wasn't fun,
rice :)
home after hip.
btw i think im becoming a better person,
thank you very much chris.
the needs and the wants.

spain out,
italy should not have gotten that pentaly.
argentina playing germany next,
holland and ghana are out too.
brazil with france,
sweden and ecuadar out,
portugal and england on sat,
oh there's going to be rioting.

-for neither lives,
while the other survives

2006-06-27T21:09:00.000+08:00

-to feel lost,
to feel gone.
i wondered what's life,
and who fate pays.

my heart sank real deep.
whats happening to you,
i wish i could earse that part,
cos i do know how it's like,
that feeling.
i've been through it,
but of cos different.
i just wish everything ends up right

i wondered why they were here,
i wondered where you've gone.
im missing you,
even if we fight

came in during geog,
singing to "blind".
i keep missing you,
though i know it's nothing now.
chris for the afternoon,
roy was there.

-but i couldn't make you see it

here i go,scream my lungs out and try to get to you

2006-06-26T21:02:00.000+08:00

-here's to loving you

each day passes,
and i ask myself,
how long more for i see this falling,
how long more till you pretend it's ok.
how long more till we ,together get help.
we're breaking,
we're falling,
and all you can do,
is pretend the world's ok

now today was ok,
jas is sadly not in our classes,
tiffany ,wee,gris ,michelle is.
dead tired.
holland's out.
grey's in a while,
i thought of watching whicker's park.

im sorry my dearest,
it's not your fault.
it's no one's relaly.
it's just fate,
finding it's way of making me stronger.
wait making us stronger.

-sometimes i think,
i can't go on without you,
truth is i can't.
you are my strength.
you make my day,
you break my day.
you whole me,
you make me.
i know you'll never be mine,
but my sweetest love,
if you hear to read,
i can't let you go,
your too presious,
your too real,
your too mine.

2006-06-25T19:12:00.000+08:00

-after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

portugal vs holland today,
england vs ecuadar,
f1 with alonso as pole.
high school musical.
all a must before school starts.
homework is done,
everything is perfect,
everything but the usual nametag.
my mission to lost weight just two days,
is lost.
forget it yeah.
it is not a need.

i know this is weird to say,
but i miss loving you.

-and i will always love you

2006-06-24T13:19:00.000+08:00

-and i don't want the world to see me,
cos i don't think they'd understand.
when everything's made to be broken,
i just want you to know who i am

punjabi school was cool,
i love manprit.
third class,
it's good to be back.

should i delete,
should i not delete this blog.
i like a blog for thought's are mine,
i hate blogs for i think bull.

and i give up forever to touch you,
and to know that you feel me somehow.
your the closest to heaven that i'll ever be,
and i don't want to go home right now.

oh dy,
i don't think i like u,
anymore.
i think you've been just a phase.

-feel so broken up